It’s like one of those bad dreams in which you’re in a situation that you just can’t find an out to.  You look and climb and run and plead but you just can’t find the right path, door, whatever.

Well this is how I’ve been living for the past four or five weeks of my life. You may have noticed a lack of updates on my Life Blog.  I had taken a dive into the deep social scenes of college life and started to drown. 

Some of you are thinking to yourselves, “oh, she’s one of Those kids who can’t handle being independent,” or, “This is one of Those stories again.”

Yeah?  Well I used to read stories of college “eff”- ups and think the same thing.

It can happen to anybody, and it can happen without you realizing it.. until it’s too late.

This year I had joined a sorority.  I had made many more friends and have attended all of the main entertainment events of this semester so far.

I had also managed to miss three homework assignments, skip 5 classes, show up to French class drunk, fake sick from a volunteering assignment, and drink for a record-breaking 6 nights in a row.

Not to mention I have yet to wash my bedsheets.

Okay, so maybe I’m just really overwhelmed with everything, and I just need to catch up.

The scariest part of it all is that I started to accept it.  I stopped caring.  I let my grades fall.  I just wasn’t myself anymore.

And then last weekend my close friend got pulled out of college by his parents.  They had been hearing stories from his roommates of how he wasn’t going to classes, partying constantly, and skipping his service hours (from a misdemeanor this summer.)

This was an awakening for me.  I wasn’t at his level of “effed-up-ness,” but I know how he started out.  Last fall, this kid was a scholar.  He was always studying, keeping organized, and taking care of his drunk friends during Friday night shit-shows.

It’s amazing how steep the slope of irresponsibility is.  Especially when you watch other people fall.  They fall fast.

So today I’ve decided to turn myself around. 

I started off well.  I made my bed.

Help me through this.  Any encouraging words will suffice.